How my mindset around money, shifted!

Hello, everyone! Welcome to my blog posts, where I share my own financial advice from my mistakes to wins, as well as mental well being. Simply because, I believe they go hand in hand. If you're new here, my name is Michael, and I am going to go over, how I changed my money mindset!

What I often see, from what comes up with the mindset about money, is simply the law of attraction. For example, if you think this certain way, money will come to you. Saying, "I don't have the money, 'yet'", means the money will magically appear one day, for the thing you needed back then, which could be irrelevant now. Which don't get me wrong, that's great! I do practice it, when it has a time and place. Especially when I actively work on, and keep in the back of my mind at all times. I do think it is helpful to have that positive mindset around money.

However, I have not gotten to where I am, and I will not get to where I want to be financially, is not by thinking about money differently. Its more so, things happen. Events occurred in my life. I had these realizations, and still do to this day, and that is how I got to this point.

I am somebody who is very realistic, and I prefer to see things as they are. So, if something isn't a reality, it is challenging for me to grasp that as something that is tangible. I am going to share some things from as far back as to when I was a teenager, maybe earlier. Sometime when I started to think these things.

When I would see somebody on the highway, driving an expensive car. Whatever that car was at the time, this is about 20-25 years ago, maybe longer. I would sit in the car I am in, and remember thinking, "they are rich, and I will never have that because I am not rich. Those things are only reserved for rich people." That is kind of my mentality around money and wealth. My family was barely middle class, I would say. Definitely on the lower side of middle class. We barely had everything we needed. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for everything my mother has done for me to this day. But, my mom always had debt, she was always working. Ex step father at the time, would spend extra cash on beer every other day, instead of investing in his family or himself. I do recall times when finances were stressful for them, and I had to work to pay some of the bills. Simply for their poor decisions around money.

That's not the point of this blog, I feel like I am rambling at this point. The point that I am trying to make, is that money is something I was never educated on. We were not financially wealthy. We were well off, enough. Most days of the month, we were ok.

I did things by the book, somewhat. Whether, what society wanted you to do. That was to graduate from high school, go to college, get a good career, get married, by a house, have some kids. That is how you're supposed to live life. Society teaches you that hard work and education is more important than skills, generational wealth, anything like that. I did not learn about finances. Y'all will know that I started learning about finances, because of my own financial decisions, my own faults. I had a whole bunch of debt, and still do, to this day, just not as high. I use to be very low income, struggling to get by, and I am back in that boat of struggling to get by from the way the economy is right now. I made bad purchases, spent more than I should of. Have pervious cars almost repossessed. Just losing sleep at night, from the debt and financial decisions I have made in the past.

Even back in college, I realized I could be rich, I could be better than how I grew up, My children don't have to worry. It wasn't reserved for all rich people. I did learn that. Like in my late teenage years, or even early twenties. It wasn't until my early thirties that I realized, those mistakes, and learning from them. I know that one day, I can get to where I want to. You get the idea. That was one realization.

I graduated early 2016, with an associates in IT, and I continued working, and I got the notification that I need to start paying my student loan debt. Like 6ish months after graduating. I believe you get 6 months of forbearance after graduating. It was around the low $200 something a month. I looked at my income, I looked at what I had to pay already, plus the student loan debt. I said, "where is that money going to come from? I cannot afford this!"

Like I mentioned, this whole journey has been a series of events and realizations. The event: I had to start paying my student loan back. The realization: I need to try and start using my degree. I should take this, and all of my career, and make my money back. I do want to say this, I knew while I was in school, I didn't want to do anything IT related. I am decent with technology, yes. However, I am not passionate about it. I am more passionate about helping others. I only pursued it, to make my family happy, but I never furthered my education or career with technology. Although I currently work in telecom sales at this very moment. I did apply for jobs that I would be qualified for, such as software testing and programming. However, I wasn't motivated. If I remember correctly, I was miserable 2 months into the software testing/programming job. I always wanted to work with something on the internet, since It was still emerging, and flourishing at this time, and before I even graduated. I always wanted to be self employed. I never liked the idea of working to make someone else wealthier.

As the months passed, I needed to suck it up, and find a career, although all I had were just jobs, that barely paid my bills. No motivation to pursue what I wanted to originally. Back in 2019, I reached my lowest of lows, my rock bottom. Financially, mentally, physically, etc.. Those who know me, know this. Financing my current car, going back to school for psychology (remember when I said I wanted to help people, this was a start), my credit cards, medical debts, to owing family money. I was spiraling out of control. I did not, and I do not like this feeling, and I remember saying out loud, something needs to change. Again, the event, I hit my highest point of debt or my rock bottom if you will. My realization, I want to be out and to continue staying out of debt.

So i started listening to podcasts, YouTube videos, reading blogs, etc.. of all these financial advisors out there, sharing their wealth of information. Taking the good with the bad. I would commute to work, listening to these people. Day in and day out, and I still do to this day. When I first looked at my debt, I thought I could pay it off in 15-20 years, with what I thought was realistic. Maybe even slightly sooner. By listening to these people, I realized, I could probably pay it off in 5-10 years instead, maybe sooner if the stars align, and took it seriously. Again, another event: listening to these financial advisors. Realization: I can pay off my debt sooner, than I thought.

Another event happened in 2023, and that was when I moved out on my own. Well, not really. Moved into the place I am now, with my wife. I use to only rent out bedrooms prior, because that was all I could afford. However, because I am not renting out a room, I am paying much more in rent, although I am closer to work. I realized, I needed to get much more serious with my debt, and finances, because I am no longer living with my sister, for the last 4ish years. Every month, I do the math on what I spend and make as a household, incoming and outgoing cash flows. That is when I started budgeting and tracking more seriously, because I knew I had too. I have to be more serious about debt pay off. So I can have a peace of mind, knowing I can afford to pay my rent. This just pushed me to be better.

I spent hours, and hours on researching on finances. While I was walking, working, driving. I was and am consuming everything I can about the subject matter. I learned so much. These have shaped many of my decisions after that and forced me to take this even more seriously. Just making more progress. I was learning more about investing, savings, emergency funds. I started investing more, I started saving more, while tackling my debt. Most of it of course, is focused on paying down my debt, but all of it progressed one after the other.

Now I have started this blogging site. I am starting school to finish my bachelors in finance. For me, it served as a huge source of motivation. I want to show y'all, how much I am spending, and how much I am saving. How much debt I am paying off, where my money is going, tracking my progress. That will help me, and help whoever, with holding themselves accountable. Looking back on everything, its crazy how all these events have happened, so quickly.

For a lot of people, these years would be the worst years of their lives, but for me, they're the best years. It made me realized, I really love to work for myself, I really love helping others, and I really love finances. I was always good at math growing up, and still am good with numbers to this day. Going into my regular 9-5 telecom sales job, gives me so much anxiety, since I don't know if its going to be a productive or unproductive day, since I can't force people to come into the store, and this job is very seasonal. I wish I have taken what I wanted to do more seriously when I was younger, but you live and learn.

I just want the comfort of my home, with my family to be happy, and healthy. I want mine and my wife's businesses to succeed, to where we are completely working for ourselves. It's going to take some time, I am working on my QuickBooks certifications, I have looked into resources to go back to school while not accumulating more debt for accounting and business finance. I am pursuing my 401k, my Roth IRA, my savings, etc.. I am making more money than I have ever made in my life with my current job. But it's not enough for us in this country.

That's honestly where things sort of end. For the events and realizations. I am making more money, and spending less money. I am able to save, invest, pay off my debt, all at one month at a time. Soon to be debt free in the next couple of years. Once I am debt free, I know it will open up a lot more opportunities in general. I know life will feel lighter without the debt over my shoulders. I know I will also be self employed. I am never challenged or happy working at other companies. These have been my goal for a little over a decade, and I feel it is right around the corner, and know I will be living my true dream.

I know what I am talking about isn't about money mindset shifts, but I hope a lot of people can relate to this. I know there are times, and information out there about money mindset shifts that need to happen before your financial journey begins. Abundance and gratitude, taking responsibility, forgiveness (for yourself, and others that got you into a situation), growth, learning, acceptance, are all huge. However, I find these come naturally when you notice these events and realizations, is where I am getting at. I know if you look up money mindset on the internet, a lot of things are going to say, "visualize what you want", "put out this energy", and "listen to these manifestations or affirmations", these are helpful yes, but so many people rely on these alone, without putting work in. If money was easy, we would all be rich. It took me years to get to where I am at now, and where I am at now, isn't enough. Now, I want to go further, and make more money on a monthly basis, and that alone is still challenging. It's not just a shift in mindset, its a shift in behavior as well to get where you want to be. Shifting your behavior helps open your eyes.

I know I have more to say, but this is just the jist of it. It's ok if you also struggle. Its not a race, about how money comes to you. Being someone who likes facts and proof of things, manifestations are hard. That is amazing if it works for other people, and they can set their mindset up like that. However, the brain that I have, and the way I think, changing my behaviors, and my decisions helped me get to where I am financially today.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, if you have any questions please post comments below. I greatly appreciate you guys.